boldly-go-plus-ultra:

livingdeadpoetssociety:

livingdeadpoetssociety:

The best line in Lilo and Stitch is, “No! Don’t touch that! It’s from my blue period!”

Like not only is Lilo familiar with goddamn Picasso despite being maybe 8, but she’s made enough serious art of her own that she can divide it into similar periods.

Lilo is a goddamn prodigy. She is an eccentric genius on par with Tesla or Van Gogh.

Like those pictures she took were both dismissals of beauty standards (she mostly photographed fat people who were not conventionally attractive and she referred to them in awe as beautiful) and subversions of the dehumanization tourists subjected her to as a native Hawaiian (she photographed tourists like they were simply part of the landscape, just as they did to her).

This little girl understands art better than me.

Lilo was the hero of those movies and the show. She saved Stitch from Jumba and himself, she saved Jumba from himself, she helped save the planet, she helped save all the experiments, she helped Jumba and Pleakley find a loving home and be part of a family. Lilo had a perfect balance of “do no harm but take no shit.”

xeno-lalia:

spinejackel:

I recently found my “gold” hammer after misplacing it. It’s my favorite tool ever because it looks like a regular hammer trying to be fancy,

but then you twist both halves and unscrew it to find a flat-head screwdriver in the middle.

BUT, if you twist the very end and unscrew that

you find a phillips screwdriver.

BUT DON’T THINK THAT’S ALL THERE IS! THERE’S MORE!! unscrew the very end again to find a smaller flat-head screwdriver!

BUT THAT’S STILL NOT THE END!!

unscrew the end of this screwdriver to find a final, teeny tiny, flat-head screwdriver

look at how cute it is!

it’s like a matryoshka doll of tools.

I have one of these and I keep it in my IT toolkit because that teeny little screwdriver is the right side for laptop casings, but because it lives inside a large object it’s harder to misplace than a standard tiny screwdriver. Also because the look on a client’s face when you bring out a brass hammer to fix their laptop is absolutely wild.

derinthemadscientist:

johnnyfourballs:

rrozeselavy:

rich ppl are like so easily convinced abt ghosts I remember growing up it was near this vacant lot and whenever I broke a toy instead of going to face the wrath of my mother I would fucking bury it in that lot and then sure enough, some dude tried to develop the land and found a ton of buried rotten dolls and shit and told everyone it was haunted

it’s been over a decade and that lot is still vacant 

You single handedly tanked the value of someone’s prime real estate and that makes me happy

As soon as I read this I immediately started thinking of ways to do this on purpose to get cheap land and I was five posts down my dash before I realised I was becoming Scooby Doo villain

marquisdehockey:

So I can’t stop thinking about the falcs making a video after that press conference and it’s full of intentionally bad acting and starts with one of the falcs pretending to read and then doing that whole “Oh, i didn’t see you there” thing to the camera. He says something like “many people have been asking how Jack Zimmermann fits in the locker room, so we’ve decided to clear a few things up”

He’s holding a measuring tape

“It’s quite a large locker room. Here are a number of other things that fit in it”, and then its a whole series of shots from the same angle showing different things while snowy or someone gives a voice over:

• “Zimmboni”, Jack’s standing there, waving awkwardly at the camera
• “A zamboni”
• “Zimmboni on a zamboni” (Jack, sitting on the zamboni, “how did you guys even get this in here”)
• “Two cowboys” it’s Ransom and Holster in cowboy costumes
• Ransom: this locker room is big enough for the two of us
• Holster: *thumbs up*
• “Lord Stanley’s cup”
• “Lord Stanley’s ghost”, accompanying a shot of an apparently empty locker room
• “At least three of Bitty’s homemade pies”
• Jack, Bitty, and Tater are holding a pie each
• Tater is rapidly eating his
• Tater: “two and a half”
• “three hundred pounds of potatoes”: Tater posing with a sack of potatoes
• “three hundred kilos of potatoes”: Tater posing with several sacks of potatoes”
• “three hundred tonnes-” “no.”
• “All of these current, past, and honourary members of Samwell Men’s Hockey”
• Ransom and Holster are still dressed as cowboys
• Jack is looking adoringly at Bitty
• Tater, the honourary member, is holding an empty pie dish and using Jack’s distraction to steal some of his

Now all the falcs are standing in front of the camera, and the introduction is, “but there are some things that don’t fit in the locker room” and they each take turns to list an item:

• “The Titanic”
• “A blue whale”
• “The Clyde river”
• “Three hundred tonnes of potatoes”
• “you never know until you try-”
• “No.”
• “Zdeno Chara on stilts, unless you… sort of… tilt him sideways”
• “Woodstock”
• “A goose”
• “Actually, I’m pretty sure we could get a goose in here”
• “That’s what I thought, but George was adamant that we couldn’t”
• “And bigotry”

And then it ends with a graphic of a giant X next to the word “bigotry”, and a giant tick next to the word “pie”

nutheadgee:

parttimepup:

parttimepup:

Do you ever think about how sperm don’t work right at body temperature and that’s why males have external testicles? Design-wise that is such a huge risk to take. Your most important organ is swinging free outside your body, vulnerable to injury or attack. All because one (1) type of cell, your fucking gametes for christ’s sake, cannot function at the normal body temperature of the organism they belong to. What the fuck. I never want to hear a man try and say females are biologically inferior ever again.

While I’m at it also they have to share one hole that they both pee and have sex out of. That’s fucking gross and unsanitary. Everytime a man cums in you you’re also getting all the pee that was in his urethra enjoy that thought ladies. You know how many holes birds have? One. They pee, poop and have sex all in the same hole it’s called the cloaca. You know how many holes women have? Three. Because we evolved one. Evolution-wise, men fall somewhere between a chicken and a human female. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

Evolution-wise, men fall somewhere between a chicken and a human female

Is just about the most legendary sentence I have ever read in my life in any language..

jammy-lannistray:

can we take a second to ponder on the fact that a kids movie did lady armor better than the entire film and comic industry

guess who i’m talking about

did you guess? Well you’re fucking WRONG because it’s Susan goddamn Pevensie

They gave her light armor, appropriate for a small archer:chainmail, an arm brace, chest plate, and a light skirt she can easily run around murderizing dudes in the face in

her hair is also only loose in the promo pictures because Susan is fucking busy not dying because her hair was flying into her eyeballs so she braids that shit back

her mail shirt is also loose enough that it doesn’t impede her arm movements it’s almost like she’s dressed for a fight wow

I like the pinks and purples under her bitchin as hell leather armor here, because you don’t have to be masculine to shoot someone in the goddamn face