roumanian:

i forgot how fucking weird november is theres no afternoon its just night after 2pm

queer-sighted:

queer-sighted:

my mother just opened our dishwasher and said “oh my god our dishes!”

our dishwasher broke over a year ago

our missing dishes have been in the dishwasher since 2013

the mystery has been solved

I just want to add that my grandmother found out when talking to my mother and had to hang up the call because she was so ashamed of us

softurl:

garbage-empress:

PSA

@pregnantseinfeld informed me that I was in a Buzzfeed article (with @creamynut and @bootyscientist2) a few months ago and had no idea.

Turns out that Buzzfeed just embeds Tumblr posts.

So if they take a post you’re in and say, embed it from your blog:

You can go back to the post and edit it to whatever you want and it will appear in the article like that. So you can do things like add “pay me royalties” 100 times

and upload 10 pictures of Waluigi in the T Pose

And ruin the article formatting.

@afro-elf

communistbakery:

fuckingpunchmeintheface:

communistbakery:

growing up with three parents was really weird

what?? u had three parents??

yeah my mom’s a gemini

itseasytoremember:

me: i wanna swim in a natural pond or lake, i want to walk in and see the moss and the trees and the little fish and just be one with nature

also me: hUHEDN SomNETH sloPRY TOUHCY MEy LEG

dramaticdragon:

drawnsheep:

dramaticdragon:

Shoutout to my 90 year old grandma with dementia (she thinks she’s back when she was 20) and she misunderstood us when we said her nursing home cook didn’t make food for OTHER people and she thought we said “colored people” and she got so mad she was ready to steal food so she could feed everyone. Keep in mind she thinks she’s in like 1940s and she is READY to defend poc. Shout out to you grandma.

I also appreciate that she’s sure she can steal food from the cook

90 year old thief. She doesn’t play when it comes to equality

pukicho:

sappingmyscenttree:

pukicho:

Jelly fish just do their own fuckass thing

cut out all your nerves and chuck them in the sea and see how fucking productive it becomes

what do you want them to do, fucking taxes?

You mistake my comment for anger, when in reality, I deeply respect them as my friends